Ah, the Oh So Important, yet Humble, Semicolon.
It is my grandson’s golden birthday today, but I felt like it was mine this morning during my time alone with Jesus. I read and looked up my verses for today. Then I closed my Bible trying to commit to memory the last one that already started speaking to my soul. I could remember the first line. Commit you way to the Lord,” But I couldn’t remember the last line. So I looked it up again. Ah yes, “...trust him and he will do this:”
The first time I read it, I was encouraged in regards to today. I meet a new doctor and have been battling much fear over it. The verse encouraged me that God will take care of me during my appointment. But the second time I notice the punctuation. There’s a semi colon. Those can’t be ignored. They’re super important! The verse, the thought, doesn’t stop there. What is the “this” that God will do? Verse 6, “He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noon day sun.” It was like unwrapping a perfectly timed gift. Joyfilled tears over His provision and perfect timing flow again. Ever since I made this appointment a month ago, I’ve repeatedly asked myself why I am even going? It’s a conventional doctor that just going to give me conventional “solutions”. I use that word lightly. And more than that, she will give me a hard time, cross examining me for all my choices she completely she thinks are sheer madness. I don’t have the emotional energy for that battle. So why do I go? What do I want from her? Prior to my time in the Word with Jesus, I made a list to help me focus my priorities and clear my wandering, anxious mind: I want to know my current status. Is it active in my neck, my brain, my armpits and any where else. Is my lymph system clogged in my breast? Any suggestions that are healing and not harmful for my body? But God’s timing is always perfect. This morning, that verse, verse 6 was my gift. Because that’s what I really want. “He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noon day sun.” I am not too crazy about the word “your” in that last line. I want “my” cause to be “His” cause. But if I go back up to verse 5 where it says, “commit your way to the Lord,” “my” way and “His” way have already collided as I have been trusting and obeying and committing my way to Him all along. Peace. He created my body. He created it to heal and regenerate...when I treat it well and with respect. Nuking (chemo), burning (radiation), scarring/dismembering (surgery), and being some greedy, mad scientist’s guinea pig (immuno therapy) are not life giving solutions from my perspective. I want people, patients and doctors to know there are other ways, regardless of how crazy I may sound to our culture. So I go, casting my fear at Jesus feet. Praying for my doctor. Praying for myself, that my attitude and words are full of love and gentle truth instead of defensiveness. No need for defenses when the battle is the Lord’s. Defensiveness comes when it is my own personal agenda. And as a persecuted pastor miraculously intervened from a death sentenced in Saudis Arabia profoundly said, “Until God is finished with you, you are invincible!”
Do not fear.
“He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noon day sun.” Psalm 37:5&6